I'm not one to judge (well, maybe sometimes) . . .

Look, I've had my share of driving problems. . .

My first (and only) speeding ticket cost me $332. That's 10 for each mile (I was 27 mph OVER the speed limit) and the rest to pay for online driving school. (Which, btw, there was an end of course exam, open book, untimed . . . I didn't score 100%. Really? How is that possible?)

In my defense: I was trying to get home to visit my wonderful family and new niece, Sym.

Also in my defense: When I passed the cop, I instantly pulled over . . . didn't even wait for him to turn his lights/siren on. See, I do admit when I'm wrong. (Sometimes.)

Not in my defense: 27 MILES OVER THE SPEED LIMIT--what was I thinking?! (At least it made my passenger, Lee-Lee, smile. I refused to let him drive because he was a crazy driver. I can still see that smug look on his face . . . and yeah, I let him drive the rest of the way home.)

My first (and only) accident involved me and a fence that I hit at 10-15 mph? not sure . . . not really paying attention to the speedometer at the time.

In my defense: I only hit the fence with such gusto because I was struggling to slam on the brake (to avoid the collision) but rather slammed on the gas.

Not in my defense: I was only struggling to slam on the brake (to avoid the collision) because I jumped out of the truck to type in the fence code (to open it) without putting the truck into park. I jumped out, the truck kept going, I jumped back in, slammed on . . . the gas . . . and you know the rest.

Okay, so I get (I really do) how the oldies (but goodies) drive through restaurant windows and into medians and all that. But I cannot figure out this one that happened at a grocery store about 2 miles away this past week. . .

According to the report, "The driver of an SUV had driven her vehicle right past the disabled-parking signpost — over it, in fact — and right up on top of the Toyota Camry parked in front of it, where it came to rest with the two occupants inside [the SUV]."

How do you accomplish a feat like that? I hope I never find out . . . but with my record, I am well on my way to becoming that driver. When it happens to me, I'll let you know how its done . . . in case you want to try it too.